Saturday, 16 October 2010

i wrote this for you! you? who? errr entah i don't know :D

I still miss you. I’ve tried hating you, distancing myself from you, being nothing with you. It didn’t do anything but make things worse. Not being able to be around you or talk to you just made me miss you more. I wish I never did say I hate you; everyone’s right about how strong that word is. You bruised me and it’s unfair that I’m the only one still hurting while you’re not. I wish we were both okay. I’m glad that you’re happy, but I’m angry that you’re still haunting my thoughts. It’s been over a year and it’s still hard. We hadn’t even been together for that long and you still have that impact on me. I hate that I went out with you and gave you a second chance; I should’ve followed my instincts. Maybe we could’ve been friends. I’m sorry that all I did was spread my hatred of you but I don’t hate you and it didn’t help me get over you by saying how much I hated you. It’s okay that you moved on; it’s just me. I don’t want to like you, I don’t want to miss you. I want to be friends but the most we’ll ever be is nothing. I’m scared to ever tell you this because I’m scared you won’t even talk to me. I’m scared you’ll tell her cause all everyone knows is that I hate you. I’m scared that you deleted my number. Although you told me you missed me once. I’m scared you’re not as understanding as me. Maybe it’s just best for me to keep things the way they are now and be a complete stranger. I regret telling you that there was nothing wrong with me although there was a lot on my mind, I regret not speaking up when you made me angry cause all I wanted was to be a perfect couple, but you made it and I remembered when we were together that’s all I ever wanted you to do for me. To fix your life. And I wanted to be there to help you make things better. In a week, I probably won’t ever see you again. I wish something so good never ended this way and it hurts that things won’t ever be okay between us.

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